Last letter
by BBCRULES
Summary: Well, with Matt leaving the show, I am depressed. He's my first doctor, and I don't know how I would say good-bye to him. This is my tribute to the 11th. As this is my first Doctor Who fanfic, reviews are very appreciated and valued. Thanks so much.


Silence fell in the street. The moon was hiding behind the clouds, heralding November drizzles in the following morning. No one was out in the street at 2:30 in the morning. Even the road was lack of any passing headlights. Only street lamps were illuminating the vacant street. All of a sudden, a blue police phone box appeared out of thin air around the corner. A tall rangy man in suits and a bowtie walked out of the box and entered the house. The lock of the door was useless; the door gently clicked open when the man turned on his screwdriver. He didn't take long to get out. Soon the box disappeared with husky wheezing sound. An owl screeched, and as if it were a signal, insects started their fall night medley in whispers. Some tree leaves, withered in red and yellow, let go of their hold to the tree branches and floated into the air.

A month later, Clara Oswald yawned, totally exhausted with Christmas shopping and her adventure with the doctor. Her hand reached out for the British History book, the subject of her hatred. Now the hand flipped the pages and stopped at Elizabeth the First. Her eyes took in the printed sentences that magnificently failed to describe what had really happened in her reign. The doctor had materialized around her when she was walking towards the bus stop with the shopping bags. She had warned him not to peek into the red shopping bag as he was supposed to open it on Christmas morning. He smiled like a little boy, but his eyes, somehow, held a sorrow, no, rather despair or detachment. She had forgotten it, but now his eyes strangely bothered her.

She was shoving the history book back to the shelf when something blue flashed in her eyes. Tardis blue. She flipped the pages and found a blue envelop well hidden in the past pages of the book. The envelop was addressed to her, and she eagerly opened it. Soon her fingers started to tremble.

_To my impossible girl_

_Clara, my lovely brave miracle girl. You've been travelling with me for some time. No, my bad. Not some time. You've been running with me all through my regenerations and saving my life from danger. Have you ever seen my companions? You met my wife, River Song, but strictly speaking, she was family._

_I think the answer would be no. You only appeared in my life when I was endangered and alone. I assume you had left a note to Midshipman Alonso Frame to keep him remain on the bridge; I think it helped to prevent the Titanic from crashing to the earth. I got a letter from Captain Jack who asked about you._

_I have met so many wonderful, courageous, laudable people in my life. I've lost all of them. I left people that I loved from the bottom of my heart. After parting some had established their own paths with a success like Jo and Sarah. They were my proud companions. How happy I was to see them again. Others are living in the parallel universe with a dim hope of reunion. Some people have perished. Others even don't remember me or the adventures. There were few who were sensible enough to get out. _

_The adventures that I have had with my companions were not always glorious or fun. There were people who died for me or my values. You know the Pond family. I've tried to shield Amy and Rory from harms as much as possible. Yet, shall I call it fate, or the combination of bad luck? I failed to protect them. My Ponds, Amy, Rory, and Melody(You know her as River)..., my brilliant Ponds, and in the end, I lost all of them.I thought I would be able to cheat time and death for them. I thought I could save them from inevitable fate-but all on a whim. Not a day passes without thinking of them._

_Every one of them deserved a better life. Clara, their lives got complicated and deteriorated when their paths crossed mine. Throughout this reincarnation as the 11th, I've been manipulative and secretive. I've never thought myself as good, and the name that I chose, Doctor, well reflects my actions. You get the word, Doctor, from me as healer and wise man. But my name also means a might warrior in other parts of the universe. Dr. Simeon was not all wrong when he declared I am a cold-blodded tyrant. Self-loathing is like an odorless, colorless poison that seeps through your veins into your destruction. I was so close to my demise, but there were two people who changed my self-perception. My wife, River, who gave me hope that I could be a good person. You, Clara Oswald, convinced me that I am._

_I lost River in the library when I met her for the first time. Her preserved memory had just faded away after a belated, yet proper good-bye. Then I realized, after I had brought you home from Tranzelore, all of my companions had deserved a proper farewell. The blame is on me: I always hate the ending._

_Forgive me for writing this letter. This is the farewell. I feel my days in this incarnation are numbered. My face and body will change but it doesn't affect what I am; I will keep my memories, though some will be fainter than others. Don't worry. You'll recognise me. You always will. After all how many people will fly around in a 1970's police phone box?_

_Clara, my impossible girl, you are brave. Just consider regeneration as the molting that a caterpillar changes into a butterfly. You have experienced something similar to it when you were scattered away in many incarnations. You know I will be fine._

_Thank you so much for saving me. Before I go, I'd like to ask you one last favor. Don't do something stupid if you see me regenerate. Don't shed tears. It's not the end. It's a fresh start, and I assure you that we're going to have many more adventures together._

_Well, Clara. Geronimo._

_Doctor._

Her eyes burned when they spotted the red shopping bag that held the present for the doctor. Her pale fingers clutched the blue envelop and the letter. The groans of the blue box had been something of welcome for her so far. Next time, she wasn't sure if she'd love to welcome the appearance of Tardis. She whispered hoarsely,

"Good bye, doctor. See you around."

* * *

A/N. Wow, I've finally done it. I wrote my first doctor who fanfic. Matt Smith is my first real-time doctor, and I am not sure who I would be able to say good bye to him. I had to write this. Thanks for reading and reviews are very valued and appreciated.

P.S Thanks for reviews. Some people, I pm, but those who choose not to receive PMs, then I'd like to thank you here. You guys have just made my day.


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